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Post by Schamæl on May 28, 2009 21:59:54 GMT
lol orate then  "Normal" ... *sigh* what a restraint ...  |
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Post by Chris on Jun 14, 2009 21:41:36 GMT
My wife complains that she will not share the same bed as "me and my smelly bum."
Well, I felt sorry for him when he was sleeping on the street.
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Post by Wightsnowolf on Jul 23, 2009 13:31:20 GMT
There were two people in a pub.
One said to the other,
"where do you come from?"
"Ireland" the second replied.
"Why, I am from Ireland too!"
"what school did you go to?" the first said,
"St Marys" said the second.
"By gosh, me too!" said the first.
By now someone asked the bartender, "who are them two?"
The bartender replied, "Oh, the old Irish twins are at it again!"
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Post by Chris on Jul 23, 2009 19:58:53 GMT
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club.
A phone on a bench begins to ring so a man answers it and engages the hands free speaker function, beginning to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: "Hello."
WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the golf club?"
MAN: "Yes"
WOMAN: "I'm out shopping and I've found this beautiful leather coat. It's only £5,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"
MAN: "Sure - go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2009 models. I saw one I really liked."
MAN: "How much?"
WOMAN: "£90,000."
MAN: "Really, go for it? But at that price make sure you get it with all the extras!"
WOMAN: "Thank you honey! Oh, and one more thing... The house we wanted last year is back on the market."
MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer."
WOMAN: "They're asking for £950,000."
MAN: "Go ahead and give them an offer of £900,000. They will probably take it. If not, just go straight to £1,000,000 because it's really what you want."
WOMAN: "OK, I'll see you later baby - I love you so much!"
MAN: "Bye, I love you too."
The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room look at him in astonishment.
He then turns and asks, "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
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Post by Schamæl on Jul 24, 2009 10:43:09 GMT
That's brilliant I love jokes like that |
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Post by Wightsnowolf on Jul 31, 2009 13:50:01 GMT
There is this boy in a reception class and his teacher says,
"Learn the alphabet tonight class"
"Ok" says the little boy.
So he goes home and says to his mum, what is the first leter of the alphabet?
She replies, "Go away"
So he says to his older brother,
"what is the second letter of the alphabet?"
He replies,
"Shut up!"
He asks his baby brother next,
"Whats the third letter of the alphabet?
He replies, "In my little brum brum car!"
So the next day, he says to his teacher,
"I learned the alphabet!"
She says, "Go on then!"
"GO AWAY!" He yells.
"Pardon?" says his teacher.
"SHUT UP!" He replies.
"Go to the head teachers office!" says the teacher.
The headteacher says,
"How do you think you will get away with this?"
"In my little brum brum car!"
LOLZ! ;D
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